Special needs, remember me when everyones noses start to bleed.

Haemophilia AGM was well good - just sorry I missed so much of it *lol*. I always worry retrospectively that I'm a bit offensive. Ah well, I'll get over it. I'm still cringing from expouting the word "orgasm" when I saw a pic of David Tennant, although 4 and 9 love was the strongest, 10 is pretty easy on the eye and he wears Converse. Fab to meet new folk and get some demented laughing in wit that there fellow vW sista. Thanks for the card Ros too, dead sweet of you darling! xxx Was especially therapeutic to lament wistfully about Blakes 7, cheers Jason and the Argonauts :), you are Teh 7 Fannonite of Legend. I'm gonna start badgering my geeky pals shortly for a trip out to this.

I saw the above in Borders yesterday and now have Dalek Operation special needs. I've been doing very well until about 2 hours ago in distracting me from hospital fears. I've had a few emo moments:
"And when I'm lying in my bed,
I think about life,
And I think about death,
And neither one particularly appeals to me" The Smiths.

Anyway, I'm not going to slide into total imbecilic emo asshole territory(just yet). I will get back on the Dawkins God Delusion in a mo. Borders was just what I needed, a bit of retail therapy and a potty full of coffee, alas no Paul Darrow autobiog. In fact I've tracked 1 down, there is only one copy in the whole of West Yorkshire. Huddersfield, home of the Standard Firework and Luddites, bless it.

Watched a couple of good movies recently, specifically Christie Malry's Own Double-Entry (*edit* it's NOT porn) - it's a shockingly good film - where a young man learns book-keeping and uses the principles of 'for every credit there must be a debit' as his life-motto. Ballsy and funny and hit a chord with me regarding my Hungerford anger management ideals. Who can be-moan British cinema?!?! AND oh OH the indie soundtrack is to die for.

Had a brief and fairly surreal with the paternoseypa tonight where he expressed a form of shock and exasperation at me 'spending money'. "Yes dad, I know you are of deep-rooted Scottish origins, I am however of frivolous English birthing and find that money and spending go together like a horse and carriage(not the best analogy I know)." This however means that he has layed his anti-moolah mitts on my bank statements illicitly! *small silent scream* I was only away for apx 48 hrs! I know they are only interfering old bags because they care and see me as an incompetant wreckless fool, but a glossing over of this small matter would be appreciated at times. I haven't had a bank charge for over a year! In fact since receiving DLA (Oct 2005) I've been doing rather swimmingly. Cheers DWP.

In other cheery news I was pleased to see NAM ATU arrived today and the title of an article 'How Soon Is Now?' - sadly they didn't work "I am the son, And the heir, Of a shyness that is criminally vulgar" into the artice better luck next time chaps. Which got me thinking which Smiths song will be mandatory for folk to sing at my funeral... I think it would have to be 'I know it's over' ;) "And I know it's over - still I cling I don't know where else I can go ..." yes how fitting. Of course there'd be the Blakes 7 theme tune(my parents even know that bit). Then they can pay (from the sale of my house/life insurance claim) for a fuck off party/disco where getting absolutely mullered/layed etc would be compulsory. Ok I'll stop with this morbid nonsense now.

I like this homo-erotic Bareback Mountain take on Conor Oberst song - this artist amazes me and inspires me in new ways, most days.

I picked you out of a crowd and talked to you I said I liked your shoes You said, "Thanks, can I follow you?"So it's up the stairs and out of view No prying eyes I poured some wine I asked your name, you asked the time. Now it's two o'clock The club is closed We're up the block Your hands on me; Pressing hard against your jeans Your tongue in my mouth, trying to keep the words from coming out You didn't care to know who else may have been you before. I want a lover I don't have to love I want a girl who's too sad to give a fuck Where's the kid with the chemicals? I thought he said to meet him here but I'm not sure I've got the money if you've got the time You said it feels good I said, "I'll give it a try." Then my mind went dark We both forgot where your car was parked Let's just take the train I'll meet up with the band in the morning. Bad actors with bad habits Some sad singers they just play tragic And the phone's ringing and the van's leaving Let's just keep touching; let's just keep... keep singing... I want a lover I don't have to love I want a boy who's so drunk he doesn't talk Where's the kid with the chemicals? I've got a hunger and I can't seem to get full I need some meaning I can memorize The kind I have always seems to slip my mind. But you, but you... You write such pretty words But life's no storybook Love's an excuse to get hurt And to hurt.
Do you like to hurt? I do, I do...
Then hurt me...